portraits

Men Suck

in

I hate to say it, but it's true. Sometimes men do suck. I went into the Apple store on Saturday to have them look at my monitor which abruptly died. So Josh and I dress the kids and hurry out of the house in order to make the 10:30 appointment. The guy working at the genius bar (give me a fucking break—who came up with THAT name?) told me that it would cost $300 to fix and that he thought I should call some other repair places because they would probably do it much cheaper. First of all, let me say that I am sure some women work as tech support at Apple, but I have never seen even one working at one of the stores at their "genius" bar. Which to me sends a really crummy message to every girl that walks into that store. But I am digressing.So the guy basically makes me feel like I am a sucker if I don't get other estimates because if I have them do it it will cost way more. Now I know that this guy was trying to be helpful. I came out at one point and asked him "If you had two young children to lug around and had NO free time, would you shop this around?" To which he answered that he did not have children. Of course not! But he thought I should price it out. So I dragged the monitor (thank GOD I no longer have a CRT) or should I say that I had Josh drag it back to the car? That would be more truthful. Then I spent about FIVE hours yesterday trying to get estimates to replace a part that it turns out that NO ONE outside of Apple can purchase. UGH! So here I am having lost two more days of work and spent hours on the phone with people talking to me like I am a simpleton, dragging the damn monitor back to the Apple store where I can't park and have to carry a baby in a car seat AND a 23" monitor. I gave the guy there a piece of my mind and he made excuse after excuse. And all he really needed to do was say "I'm sorry. How can I help?" But NO! He is a man. And all he sees is this sleep deprived, unshowered, middle-aged woman who is carrying a baby and has spit-up running down her shirt and decides I am not worth it. I am sorry, but men suck. Genius my ass. And Josh, baby, none of this, of course, applies to you. Wink, wink.

Chocolate Mommy

in

We took Sam and Ben to Maria's Tacos today and I was so bummed that I didn't bring my camera because it was such a colorful place. After lunch I took Sam to the car to nurse him and I saw some brown on his onesie. At first I thought it was poop, but it was brown and as we all know breast feeding poop is not brown. So here I am disgusted, thinking there is poop on my child. Then I realize that it is chocolate that I must have smeared onto him while I was inhaling Whole Foods truffles last night. They were organic truffles too. Because when I am bingeing I like to know that the organic goodness will make me live longer, or at the very least drain my bank account faster. So not only does my poor baby have chocolate on him, that he didn't even get to consume himself, but then I realize that it is MELTING on his neck in the hot sun. Bad, bad mommy.

Delight

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Sam was napping this afternoon in his co-sleeper when all of a sudden he started gurgling and then giggling. I peeked into the bed and he had his eyes open and was laughing. Then, just as quickly, he closed his eyes and went back into a deep sleep.

The Apocalypse

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Dreyer's came out with an American Idol series of ice creams. The end is near. And not only that but my photography website has been down for three days and I have spent a total of about 3 hours on hold/talking with the webhost techs. And on four separate phone calls I have gotten four different answers as to what the problem is (which they of course promise will be quickly resolved just to get me off the phone). If all of that were not bad enough, I had to buy Pepperidge Farm bagels today. PEPPERIDGE FARM! They're about as Jewish as George Bush. Oy!

Dim Sum

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The other night we had dumplings, which are Ben's favorite. Josh takes him to the Asian market and lets him have his pick. We savored the yummy treats while Sam looked on longingly. It's just not the same when they come out in breast milk.

Stop Wishing It All Away

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I am often wishing for life to speed up. For the kids to get to a place where they are more independent and I can have more of my freedom back. I know that I will regret this. That time will slip past me too quickly. And before I know it, they will no longer need me in the same way that they do now. I know that I need to relish the moments and that they are fleeting. I need to remind myself constantly of how lucky I am and what a gift these babies are to me.

Putting the Christ Back in Christmas

in

I was driving through the Starbucks drive thru (aka Mecca) the other day when I noticed that the truck (this IS Texas after all) in front of me had a bumper sticker that said PUT THE CHRIST BACK IN CHRISTMAS. As we all know, the Christians have been a minority that has been persecuted in this country and as a result feel the constant need to remind us of this fact. The CHRIST never left CHRISTmas. He was just avoiding the religious right.Then yesterday on my way home I drove past the Islamic center near our house and they had one of those message boards out front, like the kind you see in front of high schools that usually say 'Go Wildcats'. But this one said 'Congratulations on the birth of Christ'. WHAT?! First of all, was that a secret plea for no one to vandalize their center? And secondly, is Mary really getting all these kudos all these years later for giving birth? In a few hundred years will the local temples be congratulating me for doing such a splendid job giving birth to Sam and Ben? Is Mary singled out for extra homage because she had to go through childbirth without at least getting to have the fun of conception? I know what it is. It's because she went without the epidural, isn't it?

The Blue Genie

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Today I went to the Blue Genie Art Bazaar to do a little last minute xmas shopping with my friend Geni. It had some great stuff and I spent too much money. But it felt SO good to be supporting artists instead of Target for a change. I have always taken issue with the fact that as an artist I cannot afford to buy other people's art. In fact all of the art I have has been through trade with other artists. But in 2008 I want to start putting money where my values are. Or should I saying putting credit card debt where my values are? More realistic.

December Texas Style

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It is almost 80 degrees in our house and REALLY humid. It is 9:00 in the morning. It is DECEMBER. It just doesn't feel right to be shopping for your holiday presents in shorts. Those of you who are in snow filled communities are probably telling me how lucky I am, but what I wouldn't give for some cold weather. It is so much harder to justify lying in bed all day when it is warm outside.Edited to add: Just turned on the AC. It is wrong I tell you. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Unless you're in Australia.

The Happiest Baby in the World

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Okay. I have to say it. I have the easiest baby in the world. Sam just sleeps and eats and barely cries. He smiles all the time and only wakes me up twice per night, sometimes once. I know. All of you moms and dads with colicky, sleepless babies hate me. As well you should. It is not right to be free of sleep deprivation with an infant. It just feels wrong. Feel free to hate me. All I can say is that maybe the karma is evening out after my HORRIBLE pregnancies. They say you get what you can handle and apparently I can't handle much. But if I were to write a letter to baby Sam it would simply say: "Thank you".

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