Should I or Shouldn't I?

20 years ago I graduated from high school. Shit do I feel old! So now my 20th high school reunion is approaching and the questions is to go or not to go? I had always fantasized that I would make a glamorous return to the halls of learning where I was, lets say, 'not the hottest chick in the barn'. And three years ago that looked possible. I was thin and in shape and looking good. But alas, many binges and one baby later, I am scary. I could give Moby Dick a run for his money. So now it seems like it might be better to stay at home with a good dvd and a pint of my old pals Ben and Jerry. It's better than going and knowing that the gossip the day after will be about how I have 'let myself go'. Well, it's true. I have. But I don't have to give anyone else the satisfaction of knowing. There's the part of me that says that it doesn't matter. That who I am on the inside is all that matters. What I have accomplished should matter more. But then reality sets in. Who the fuck am I kidding? This is America! How you look is everything. Especially in high school! You can never be too rich or too thin. And I am sadly lacking in both. So unless I can lose 50 pounds in 30 days, I think I will be hangin' out with B+J. Stay tuned.